Fellow NEB readers, I recently read the article where the writer said, “He says he’s unhappy, but I can’t let him go, he’s my world.”
I’m struggling with what I fear is a similar issue. My boyfriend of two years says he loves me and wants to marry me and have children, but every time we discuss marriage he brings up problems and says he’s not happy. Finally, I put my foot down and gave the ultimatum, “now or never.” He chose never.
After discussing his choice he recanted and decided we should go to couples counseling. He is a good man and we are happy as long as we don’t discuss marriage. But, I want to be married and have another child! I have a son from a previous marriage and he treats my son like his own, worse my son is completely attached to him and when we temporarily broke things off my young son was in tears for days. We do have our problems, but everyone does. I don’t want to walk away because we have formed a family. I love him and he’s the only father my son knows, however I feel like I’m cheating myself out of the things I really want in life.
I’m too damn old to be somebody’s girlfriend! And my eggs are getting old too! I truly love him, but how do I know that he will EVER be ready to make a lifelong commitment. His longest relationship before me was 6 months and he is well over thirty years old. Do some men just never settle down? – Waiting To Be Married
At the heart of the "good enough" argument is that too many of us have been brainwashed into a "fairy tales and fireworks" view of romance that lacks long-term stability... in this case, the flesh wants to stay but the spirit is weary... Do the right thing and move.
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